The Deal
by Evachoo
Summary: AU Jake Peralta is the son of a major crimeboss, or at least, that’s what the police call His Dad. His Dad calls them entrepreneurs of the illegal. He’d laughed at that, back when he was a kid. Nowadays it was just another name for the shitty job life had bestowed him. OR The best assassin vs a little undercover cop. Too bad Jake has a thing for dorks.


**Disclaimer:** I do not own Brooklyn Nine Nine, in case y'all didn't know

 **Note:** Sorry for all the mistakes. This is unedited, and mostly written out of boredom.

 **Chapter One; Not Sara**

"And that's why we always, always, put the board games back in their boxes, guys. You know how easy the pieces get lost! There so small, and fidgety... And someone lost all the money and pieces for a certain board game! Yes, I'm talking about you, Dan. We had to buy an entirely new monopoly board! Anyway..."

Jake sighed and tuned out as his best man, Jones, blathered on. Gods, he was a great strategist and leader, but he was boring as hell. One time, he had talked about the different types of pies for an hour. An hour! Jake checked his watch discreetly. Ever since the infamous pie incident, he had given each member of his small group an allowed slot of time at the weekly discussion, to keep it short and sweet. Three minutes left for Jones. Jake shook his head and tuned back in at the sound of his name, only to find Jones shooting finger guns at him with a weird grin.

"And Jake, we know you can't make it tomorrow, because it's ya birthday, but please try not to sit at home watching die hard all day. Again. Anyway, everyone, you know your roles for tomorrow. Maggie, illusions" Maggie nodded, her face expressionless.

"Lola, get here early to do disguises. You've already done most of the work in regards to infiltration, so you're the first to enter. Dan, you're protecting Lola and Maggie. "

Lola rolled her eyes and Dan puffed out his chest "San, your on car duty. Make all adjustments to the car tonight, yeah? We need one to blend in with early morning traffic, so I'll leave that to your discretion" San grinned. He was such a car head. "I'm going to be sniping from the next building, as we've discussed, and Chantelle, please have the medical stuff already for when we come back. Sara, you're staying behind with Chantelle. Sorry, but that's the way it's gotta be for now" Jones said seriously. Sara, a new addition to their group, nodded. She was another friend of Ginas that managed to join.

"Cool beans- I mean, cool. That's cool" Sara said seriously. Jake snorted. What a dork. Jones nodded, and continued

"Finally, Sean, we need all the weapons ready to go. What's the status so far?" Sean nodded, and adjusting his shirt, began to speak

"Um, well, all the weapons are ready to go. I've made a few minor adjustments to increase the power behind them, but no worries, same controls and stuff"

Jones nodded "Well, with that all done, everyone here tomorrow, 7:30 am minimum. Jake, some parting words?"Jake sighed, and got to his feet languidly. He was almost cat like, lazy yet with claws. He grinned goofily before clapping his hands "Cool, cool, cool. Alright, robbery tomorrow. Have fun, get money, shoot cops, whatever" He paused, giving all of them a look that said to take him seriously

" And please don't do anything stupid I have to deal with later. Yes, Dan, I'm talking about you. You can't play monopoly when you get bored with guarding hostages! That's like, rule number one! Alright, everyone, g'night. Have fun. Do you, be yourselves."

The room slowly emptied, everyone talking to each other as they filtered out. Jake sighed. The abandoned warehouse had seemed like such a cool place to have a secret meetings in, but God it was creepy.

"Hey Gina! Can you stay behind for a sec? Need to chat about something real quick"The room emptied out, and Gina stayed, looking at him with blank eyes.

"This better be important Jakey. I have better things to do with my time, like being at home. My bed _misses_ me Jake. You're breaking up a family here."Jake laughed

"I totally bed-lieve you"

Gina stared "No."

Jake swallowed uncomfortably "Yup, that was pretty bad. Anyway, how was your dance last night? Sorry I missed it"

Gina grinned, and they were soon lost in their own world.

"Jake, no, the arm twist goes like this, not like that!"Jake sighed. They'd been going over choreography for half an hour. It was nearly eleven o' clock, and Jake still couldn't get the third move down.

"I am doing it like that, see!"

"Like this, Jake!"

"I am!"

"No, you really aren't"

Jake sighed, and twisted his arm ball once more, the exact same way, to finally be greeted with clapping. He sighed, and bowed.

"Thank you, oh humble queen Gina"

"No problem, frog boy"

"Anyway, I was wondering about the fourth-" Jake froze. A light turned on in the hallway.

"Gina, hit the lights!" Gina flicked the lights off quickly, and they both hid behind a large desk at the end of the room.

"Jake, it's probably a mouse"

"Mice don't turn on lights, Gina!"Jake angry whispered in response. They stayed silent as footsteps approached the room, and the door squeaked open. Who was there? What were they looking for? They were in a filing room for a gods sake! Gina peeked through a crack in the old desk, and turned back to Jake.

'Sara' she mouthed. Jake took his gun out, and held it carefully, preparing to jump up.That's when Sara's, or whoever she was, phone rang.

"Hello?"Jake grit his teeth anxiously. They were hiding under a desk, only one of them armed. He didn't want to kill Sara without knowing the full story. Besides, she could have information. No, he'd wait. He'd have to.

"Josh, you know you can't call me. I'm working"

Jake narrowed his eyes. Working? An agent, maybe. Or a cop. Or a rival gang. Who was she?

"Josh, I genuinely don't care. But yes, definitely blue. Blue socks. Blue shirt. Go blue for first dates"

Gina rolled her eyes, and mouthed 'red is way better'. Jake grinned back goofily, agreeing. Who wore blue? It was boring and screamed 'I'm an accountant at a middle tier firm!'

"Look, Josh, I have to go. Yeah, we'll be back working cases together soon, don't worry. Okay, yeah, bye, bye, bye"

She hung up, and sighed, massaging her temple. Why was she stuck with such a stupid partner? She loved him, but God he could be dim sometimes. Jake crept along the wall, to the cops back. He wasn't called the Silent Killer for nothing. He held a gun to her head, and watched as she froze up, all her limbs tensing. He dropped his voice down, keeping it menacing and calm."Drop any and all weapons, pig"


End file.
